SCENE V
Court before the same.Enter LEAR, KENT, and Fool.
Lear.
Go you before to Gloucester with
these letters. Acquaint my daughter no further
with any thing you know than comes
from her demand out of the letter. If your
diligence benot speedy, I shall be there afore
you.
Kent.
I will not sleep, my lord, till I have
delivered your letter. [Exit.
Fool.
If a man's brains were in's heels,
were't not in danger of kibes? (10)
Lear.
Ay, boy.
Fool.
Then, I prithee, be merry; thy wit
shall ne'er go slip-shod.
Lear.
Ha, ha, ha!
Fool.
Shalt see thy other daughter will use
thee kindly; for though she's as like this as a
crab's like an apple, yet I can tell what I can
tell.
Lear.
Why, what canst thou tell, my boy?
Fool.
She will taste as like this as a crab
does to a crab. Thou canst tell why one's nose (20)
stands i' the middle on's face?
Lear.
No.
Fool.
Why, to keep one's eyes of either
side's nose; that what a man cannot smell out,
he may spy into.
Lear.
I did her wrong--
Fool.
Canst tell how an oyster makes his
shell?
Lear.
No.
Fool.
Nor I neither; but I can tell why a (30)
snail has a house.
Lear.
Why?
Fool.
Why, to put his head in; not to give
it away to his daughters, and leave his horns
without a case.
Lear.
I will forget my nature. So kind a
father! Be my horses ready?
Fool.
Thy asses are gone about 'em. The
reason why the seven stars are no more than
seven is a pretty reason. (40)
Lear.
Because they are not eight?
Fool.
Yes, indeed: thou wouldst make a
good fool.
Lear.
To take't again perforce. Monster
ingratitude!
Fool.
If thou wert my fool, nuncle, I'ld
have thee beaten for being old before thy time.
Lear.
How's that?
Fool.
Thou shouldst not have been old till
thou hadst been wise. (50)
Lear.
O, let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven!
Keep me in temper: I would not be mad! Enter Gentleman.
How now! are the horses ready?
Gent.
Ready, my lord.
Lear.
Come, boy.
Fool.
She that's a maid now, and laughs at my departure,
Shall not be a maid long, unless things be cut shorter. [Exeunt.
